The Dumbing Down

I continue to learn new and wonderful things about myself and our world:

• I’m in the A-Team song-stuck-in-my-head part of the three-song rotation that includes A-Team, Tom & Jerry, and Peter and the Wolf. This is an indicator of dementia.
• People are apparently quite fond of fried chicken, and appear to just be carrying the stuff around to gnaw on wherever their feet take them. Dexter finds the remains.
• DHL drivers are the craziest of the big three delivery companies, as indicated by the driver behind me pushing sixty in a thirty-five. He was missing a turn signal, presumably because the g-forces necessary to remain upright upon cornering tore it from the truck.
• People are slobs, as demonstrated to me by the Pizza Hut server who flicked a piece of stray matter off the edge of my fresh plate in plain view of the wife and our friends.
• There are way too many choices of toothpaste, deoderant, shampoo, and a myriad of other toiletries. A fellow in the deoderant aisle lamented this problem, to which I responded, “well, good luck, and I don’t want to come back in a half hour and find you still here.” It just so happens I did return a half hour later to retrieve a forgotten item, and he was, in fact, still there. Seriously, why does Suave have an entire aisle of hair care products?
• Television shows are better when their names are interesting. I recommend using a person’s name and careful use of alliteration. Some good examples are “Hogan’s Heroes,” “Seinfeld,” “Fear Factor.” Some bad examples are “Deliberate Intent” (isn’t that redundant?) and “Renovate my Family” (umm…and while you’re here, can you pave my feelings?).