Lime juice patent
The US patent office is the best. You can patent anything. I think I’ll patent a method of pleasing taste buds by applying sugar to the tongue. Problem is, it may have already been done.
“I purchased whole limes from the grocery store (key limes I believe). The limes were cleaned, sliced, and squeezed. I consumed approximately 1 teaspoon of the fresh-squeezed lime juice shortly after noticing the onset of chest pain. Shortly thereafter the chest pain subsided.”
<shaking head>
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